Sound the Alarm

I can hear it now, my sons, when I am so old I can no longer see them bent in half, howling with laughter at my expense.

Chase:  “And then…hahaha…and then I practically FELL down the stairs tripping over all the blankets I was dragging so that we could be SAFE from the…hee hee hee…the Tor…Tor…Tor….NADO!!!  Whhhahhhhhaaaaa (cough couugh)!”

Adam:  “Hoo hoo Hoo…I know…and remember Chase ‘if you hear a train’…”

Both together:  “WE ARE GOING TO THE BASEMENT!!”

hahahahaha….

(wiping their eyes)…yeah…she sure saved us, didn’t she?

snicker.

smile.

BOTH TOGETHER:  From the deadly gas leak!!!  hahahahaha….OMG…OMG…

Adam:  You had just ALMOST DIED from your leg operations and she walks into Dad’s house and thinks she smells gas…

Chase:  Which was really only our sweaty clothes that had piled up in numerous locations…

Adam:  I had just woke up…

Chase:  at 2 in the afternoon…

Adam:  and all I wanted was a hot shower and breakfast…

Chase:  and I was limping around with that damn BOOT on AND crutches…

Adam:  and she walks in and sniffs like twice and says “what’s that smell?!” 

Chase:  and BAM!  next thing you know there she is, her cell phone to her ear, waving her hands in our faces saying…

Both together:  OUT!  NOW!  I’ll meet you at the apt.  GO and I MEAN IT!!!

Chase:  whhaaa haa haa…right…like THIS is a good plan mom, we will go to your apt. and I’ll just ease my way up your SEVENTEEN stairs so that we don’t DIE from the smell here…

Adam:  hee hee hee…and I’m like I’m STARVING I Can’t LEAVEEEEE…

Chase:  and she so took the bait and made us that killer meal when she got there, remember?

Adam:  oh yeah.  she felt so bad because…

Both Together:  We both almost DIED again!!!  bahhh hhaaa hhhaa

hoo hoo hoo

Chase:  And then when food was ready, I beat you to the counter and grabbed the first plate…

Adam:  And I got ticked…

Chase:  And she of course felt guilty and started explaining that even though she gave me first plate, in fact I WASN’T her favorite…

Adam:  noooo….it’s just that you had almost DIED in the hospital…and and and…(hiccup) that you had just got to the plate first…with your almost gangrene leg…

Chase:  And you said…hoo hoo hoo…you said…ha ha ha…”Chase will always get food first from here on out because he almost DIED!!!”

Adam:  ha ha ha ha …. (wiping tears away) … and I added…I added…

Both Together:  ALMOST DIED TWICE IF YOU COUNT THE GAS LEAK!!!!

Me:  (from my death bed in the nursing home) — okay, I can hear you, you know.  I’m right here boys.  Right in the room.

Chase:  (patting my leg) and we’re here to get you out in case the Sirens go off, mom (snicker)

Adam:  ha ha ha ha (sniffing) heyy…..what’s that smell???

Both Together:  bahh haaa haaa haaaaa